More often than not, the question...."do you know where your children are" is directed toward parents of teens. But I would toss that question out to all parents. "WHAT?" You say..."how can anyone not know where their young children are?" And the answer would be...you would be surprised!
I recently talked with a life guard who works year-round at a local swim club. I asked him if he had ever had to save a life and he had a few stories to share. His stories of heroism seemed to have a theme....he had to jump in and save children who were unsupervised, children who were more or less left for the guards to tend. For example: one parent had walked away leaving a 3 year old in a float while she went to the sauna. This young life guard had to turn the child right-side-up after she had flipped over because no adult was with her. Other children found themselves in water over their head because their mothers were more interested in sun bathing than in the whereabouts of their child.
My pet peeve is watching parents walk with purpose to accomplish their own agenda while their children...even toddlers.... follow behind like little ducklings in a PARKING LOT! Small children can not be seen by drivers backing out of a parking space....they NEED the watchful eyes of their parents.
Have we become so fixated on our own importance and needs ~ not to mention our cell phones~ that we have forgotten our JOBS as parents? Have we imposed our parental duties on life guards and expected THEM to babysit our children? Have we asked the same of movie ushers, people who work at the mall or in play areas at restaurants?
Our children need our eyes, ears and wisdom to help them grow and become the wonderful adults we envision. Please do not think that I am saying that every accident a child suffers through is the parent's fault through negligence. Accidents DO happen. My encouragement is for parents to check in and be present with their children.
Take if from an almost empty-nester, the years go by WAY too fast. You may not believe it right now, but before long you are going to be longing for opportunities to have conversations with your children.
When they were young, there were no video players mysteriously dropping from the ceiling of the car to entertain my children ( yes, I am THAT old), all they had was me. We sang silly songs, and the kids learned how to count by counting cows or cars and they learned their colors and letters from road signs. (I have wondered recently if our children will be directionally challenged and lack the skills to read maps because they are constantly watching movies while riding in the car and the parents depend on the GPS to get them where they want to go. Just a thought.)
You may get your hair wet when the kids are splashing in the pool, but the smiles you share while your young child is leaning how to swim will be memories you keep in your heart looong after your suntan fades. And you might just try skipping as you hold your child's hand as you maneuver through the parking lot. Our children deserve our attention and care as well as our encouragement and protection.
Remember, you have a captive audience when you are driving down the road in your min-van or SUV. Your kids may moan when you sing to the oldies-but-goodies, but before long they will join in and giggle along.
Tune in, connect and share the joy.
Be the Parent: Be present.
